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08:42 - Wednesday, Jan. 21, 2009
words to live by!
greetings one and all!! yesterday, after watching the swearing in of our new President, i left the theatre and i had an overwhealming feeling of a burden being lifted off my shoulders!! like a dead weight had suddenly been lifted off me! it was a wonderful feeling!! did anyone else get that same feeling? it took me the better part of the rest of the day to realize that i STILL dont have a job, and im STILL broke and homeless; but for the day, yesterday, it didnt seem to matter, a new age has dawned, and with it a new beginning and renewed hope that yes, i AM inna temporary situation, and eventually it will get better!! for i have FAITH and CONFIDENCE that it will!!

and now, a public service from the makers of josephine average, the average female american housewife, and in conjunction with the crack public service branch here at the offices of who did it and ran, ink!! a few choice words to live by!

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'

The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'

The monkey said: ' Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'

The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:

'Eat, sleep, play , marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'

But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'

'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy yourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.

so there! it has been explained to you. go eat your soup now! YUM!

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