03:23 - Friday, Oct. 28, 2005
changes
well,i had this locked, but now its not so there ya go!
i was very angry yesterday, being accused of something that i am not.
and the accusers are fuckheads and dont read this page, and are not diarylanders! it was those weasels from journal con that are so putrid that if ya dont smell like them, you dont belong!
to them i say a resounding, eat shit!
as to you, 
welcome!!
i made a mistake yesterday, thats all. i posted a story and forgot to name the source. it was 4 am for fucks sake!
when i had enough of the bullshit, i posted a entry as to what i would like to do to these ingrates and cowards, and it scared radiogurl to the point that she wont read me anymore. i am sorry for that. its just words, and i dont take action on my angry thoughts any more.
i have been wrongly accused of murder, and went through hell in a hand basket. and as a result, i have built in rage inside of me that i have learned through years of therapy and counseling, i have learned how to control and vent properly. one of the coping mechanisms is to write things down, and if its violent, i have learned not to take action on my thoughts. i am not a violent person anymore. i yell when i get this angry, i stomp my feet, i write things down. but i do not nor will i ever lash out in a physical manner.
and because i have been wongly accused, that pisses me off. yesterday afternoons rage was NOT intended for you, my diaryland pals. i thought i made that clear yesterday. if i scared anyone of you, i am truly sorry.
its like the saying, "his bark is worse than his bite."
when i started this journal, i had reservations about it, but i decided that it would be a fun thing to do. yesterday, the fun was taken out of it, and i have some thinking to do, and i need to decide if i want to continue to do this everyday. it has become a part of my daily routine, and its the 1st thing i do each day when i wake up in the morning. something to look forward to.
if i decide to continue this, i just want to make it quite clear that this is MY DIARY, and i will write what i want to in it. if you choose to read it, then thank you for reading it. if there is something in here that you do not like, thats ok, but dont accuse me of trying to pull anything, because i'm not.
yesterday afternoon, i got a email from the cat of the day people, and some shitball complained to them that i post pictures of cats that i get from there. and they asked me to stop doing that, and i will. i know that the shitball that complained to them was not one of you. so no more cat of the day from catoftheday.com. i will post cat pics from other places. just not from there. i will respect their wishes.
poolagirl, you asked me to do something for you on the day i went back home, and at this time, i cannot do that. maybe later on i will, but not right now.
so, time to move on and go forward.
