0500 temp is 10� F. freezo! - Sun. 12.3.06
dreamin' american style!!
in the dream, i was in the hilton hotel, and was talking to sen. john mc cain about how cumbersome these lamp plugs are, and how ya always trip on them; and i told him that all ya gotta do is take ya phillips screwdriver, and tip the end table upside down, and on the top corner of the right back leg of the table, push ya phillips screwdriver thru the table leg to make a hole, and then thread the plug thru the hole and then put the plug in the wall socket, and voila. no more tripping over the plug, its hidden. i sez, "go on, senator, even you can do it, its easy, the wood is soft and just press the screwdriver into it, like poking a hole inna turkey!" sen. alcee hastings of florida was there, and he witnessed this "engineering marvel" and wanted me to work for him. but i said, no, you are a crook. they impeached you off the federal bench, and how you got to be a senator, no one really knows. besides, im working for mc cain here, so butt out!!
then, the senator wanted to know if i knew my way around washington. i said i did, and he wanted me to go around town to all the little variety stores, and count all the muffins that they sold on a regular basis, and if they were fresh; after all, we cant have the american people buying stale muffins! i was to take this card, and mark down the name of the store, and how many muffins they sold, the type, and to buy one, and eat it to see if it truly indeed was fresh. i told him that i can do that, but i would have to go back to salt lake city, and quit my job, and get zipper. he said ok, and put me on a plane, and i told doyle that i quit, and im taking zipper and going to washington to work on a study panel for sen. john mc cain.
so, i tested muffins for the senator all over washington. and coffee too. was the coffee fresh? check. muffins? check. after doing this for some time, i then got a promotion, and had now to go dressup in formal wear, and go to all the fancy resturants in town, and taste the roast quails and water fowls that they were serving, and if they were suitable for society.
and while i was doing that, senator mc cain became president, and he formed a new cabinet post called the consumer affairs agency, with a annual budget of 130 million dollars, and chose me as the secretary. my title was "secretary of consumer affairs" and my salary was 250,000 dollars a year. i had my own driver, and was able to hire a walker for zipper on his leash. my new post i was to insure that all the muffins in the entire country were fresh upon purchase, and i had to develoup federal guidelines for testing the muffins, and if they failed the testing, then the grocer got fined millions of dollars!! i established offices all around the country in federal buildings, and the staff had to also insure that the water fowl being sold were up to federal standards also.
i had a townhouse in georgetown with all the trappings, and lived the life of riley, and zipper was especially happy, and he told me that living here in washington was far better than putting up with all that crap back in salt lake city, but he asked if there was anything i can do about the damn snow, as its cold on his feet!! and i decreed that all cats whom were in abode in a domicile shall be fitted with boots for thier paws when the cold and the snow came, and non compliance to this federal regulation would result in a 10,000 dollar fine.
then, i became most famous. and i woke up.
yesterday, while at work, there was a big assed fire across the street in the new hotel that just opened at the beginning of the year!!! an iggys resturant is being built, and it seems that a propane heater "fell over" causing a fire. 10.000 dollar damage! well, i guess there wont be a resturant over there for a while longer!! how does a propane heater "fall over"?
one of my tenants gave me a deep fryer complete with used grease in it and a meat slicer, complete with used strands of meat in it. he says that now i can buy a hunk of meat and slice it up and make sammichs!!! how nice. maybe i can now open a resturant, too!!! i have the basics now, a deep frier, a meat slicer, fridge, oven, burners, pots and pans!!! plates!! why not???? hehehehe!!!
well, i need to organise the kitchen now, i got these huge cooking things all clumped on the counter top!! toaster/breadbox, coffee maker/grinder, used deep fryer and used meat slicer, microwave, coffee cans and bags of coffee beans!!! all clumped in the counter top!! my clean plate rack is on the kitchen table!!pots and pans all over the stove top!! im gonna do that later!! its only 5 am and im gonna just sit here and read diaryland, and then play a lil pogo maybe.
hava fun sunday, and stay warm and dry, and dont forget to feed the cat!!!
